My 2015

How good it feels to just sit down, type away thoughts and look back to how the year had gone by so fast. There were days that I prayed to be over sooner and days I wished to go slower or never even end. But still, to live with my very first mantra, "this too, shall pass". 2015 is about to end. I can't remember being as emotional as this for the past few years of reflecting on how the year had gone by.

 As I look back, I think almost half of my life is posted on social media. Gotta change that in 2016.

I had read less, finished less than 10 books this year. Most of them non-fiction.

Climbed a couple of mountains with friends old and new.

Celebrated birthdays of old folks.

I had a few plans that got blown up.

Met amazing people along the way

Renewed friendship with a few.

Parted ways with some whom I know I will meet again in heaven. The feeling of loss still pains me. Whenever I remember, I still cry.

Tried to show my appreciation and spend time with people whom I cherish in my life, be it family, friends, colleagues, strangers and cats.

Honestly, 2015 was a selfish year. It was a year I tried to do things that really are all for my own happiness and satisfaction. Like that climb to Mt. Pulag and Gulugod Piggy. That trip to Coron with Cher Jo and Emil and that unplanned ice cream trips to that expensive Baskin Robbins and DQ among them and others I cant remember on top of my head right now. 

2015 filled me with surprises. Amazing surprises from flowers, to more flowers, and cake and letters and others I really have to take time to think of. 

Doing this recap, I hoped to remember good things, lessons and be remembered as somebody who tried to be good as well. Even though, I know that everything must come to an end and will come to an end, it is still unbelievable that it will soon be over in a few hours. Though obviously, nothing really will change as the clock tick twelve midnight for first of January, 2016. It brings so much hope that a new day and a new chance for all failed attempts and plans will come. 

I am ending 2015 working. Will be welcoming 2016 working. Not a bad idea. Focused and simple.

Thank you 2015! It was an amazing  year! Let 2016 be filled awesomeness. 

Saying goodbye and thank you to 2015 and aiming high to 2016! For more sunrises and jumpshots all over! 

DFB #4

Dear Future Boyfriend, 

I hope you dont mind brushing nail polish on my left index finger. It's a mess when I do it alone. 


Hahahaha... I'm aint looking for a boyfriend, I am looking for a kikay buddy. LOL.

25 December 2015

It’s 3 o’clock past twelve midnight. I just got up from bed and I still feel dizzy because of the lack of sleep and rest. But I can’t fight my grumbling stomach’s plea to get up and eat. So, I did. Everyone from the household has gone to bed after Noche Buena.

A few years back, I take time to collect gifts for everybody that made my year special, count my godchildren and made sure not to miss anyone. Christmas shopping used to be an exciting thing to do. Grocery shopping used to be something I look forward to. I even try to make a checklist of everything for budget and to make sure not to miss anything. Eventhough I would usually had to go to work on Christmas Eve, Christmas preparations used to excite me.

As I get older, Christmas gets more solemn, silent and alone or just being around people in small numbers. This year, my shopping list was minimal and was done the last minute. I never had plans of wrapping gifts this year, everything would have been on cash gift basis as that is the easiest and lightest way to go around. I had no plans of wrapping the gifts, but still I did. It was still a fun thing to do. Imagine wrapping excitement and then the person receiving the gift unwrapping surprise.

Christmas day itself will be spent doing the laundry. After a couple of weeks plus this week’s clothing, I can’t afford to miss another laundry session. My closet is almost empty. Haha. I was thinking of coming to Tagaytay with Tita and Tita with their guests from La Union, but my laundry couldn’t wait any longer. Then, later in the afternoon, I will go to my parents’ house bearing gifts and ready to hear the latest neighborhood “news” from my childhood friends.

A few things hasn’t changed though like taking time to spend time with people who are special and important in my life. Giving and surprises are still exciting. Gratefulness in everything and everyone will always be there. As I try to live a life of gratefulness, my Christmas will always be special. Also, Christmas is never about me.

Happy Birthday Jesus! From the manger to the cross, you gave your life to save sinners like me. I am nothing but a grateful soul for that.


Peter Quinn: ........ what else could have made a difference?


Peter Quinn: Hit Reset.

Homeland Season 5 Episode 1

Tiwi 2015

I didn’t realize that my usual Albay homecoming falls every 12th of December until the See Memories function of Facebook allowed me to see it as it is. Except for one year when my cousins were here for the holidays, my 12th of December had always been for Albay. Thankful to the recent sideline project I got, I was able to fly to my second home.

The flight was uneventful and since I just got to the airport straight from work, all I wanted to do was go through the day and be home for dinner. Unknown to me, Lola refused to take lunch because she wanted to join me for lunch since she thought I will arrive just in time for lunch.

A Saturday before typhoon Nona hit PH, the weather in Albay was cloudy with scattered rainshowers but there are still times that Mayon had been cleard of clouds.

The only tense-filled activity I did was to think of gifts for the kids at a very limited amount of time since I have to rush to the terminal and avoid being left behind the city for the last trip to my lola’s town. I didn’t bring any pasalubong, so I had to rush to the mall and buy a few stuff for the kids. For my lola, it’s automatic cash, for my titas, it would be whatever I have on my bag in exchange to whatever I can find around the house, sometimes even nothing for them. It’s kinda hard to give them gifts since they can afford most of the things I wanted to give them.

Whenever I am in the city, I make sure to eat at this local diner. 

After a plane ride, a tricycle ride, a quick lunch at the local diner, speedy shopping spree, a jeepney ride to the terminal, a short wait for the van to be filled, a short notice for a Jolllibee stop, another jeepney ride, then a pedicab ride, I am home.
I am home!
I don’t have a bed nor a room of my own anymore since they had built a new house. Since my little cousins decided to sleep with me, we just had a mattress laid out on the sala. We woke up early and since it was a Sunday, we went to the beach. When I am here, I try to do the usual things I do when I used to live here. Waking up early. Helping in the kitchen or in the pigpen, feeding the chickens, and going for a morning walk by the beach. Lola used to ask me to water the plants in the garden, probably to make grow fond of gardening and all that stuff. Also, it was the first time I came home without Lolo. 

Shot taken very early in the morning at Baybay, Tiwi, Albay. 

I had made plans to meet a few people over the course of couple days, one small reunion with a few high school friends and the other one with a very close college friend.

The trip back to the place where I spent my teen years (seven years) is always something I look forward to as I get a chance to go back where I started my dreams and be grateful to the all the people who had helped me. It is always refreshing, relaxing and recharging.

Tiwi will always be my home.

What Was.

I don’t know what is my point of writing this but I am so much into what my past was. How good. How kind. How peaceful. How simple.

Back  when I was not yet an adult.
When I was still young and innocent of the travesties of this life.
When falling in love is a great feeling, as if it's all the matters.

It WAS a good life. 

No Joke

Hindi ko alam kung anong gusto kong maramdaman sa sinabi ng High School classmate ko. 


Him: Cge, next year na lang Cat, kaso wala pa kong mabibitbit na asawa, maghahanap pa lang ako.
Me: Pag wala pa, tayong dalawa na lang, gawin kitang keychain
Him: Ayoko sayo, masyado kang maganda para sakin hehehe
Me: Nagbibiro ka lang diba?
Him: hahaha hindi eh. Di ako nagjo-joke mis pusa.

Tanong Lang

Kapag sinabi ko bang hindi ako boboto at wala akong maisip na maiboto, ibig sabihin ba nun, wala na akong pakialam sa Pilipinas?

Naisip ko lang

If ........

Duterte wins........ there will be Philippine Death Squad

Defensor wins........ there will be Agnostic Government

Binay wins........... Corruption right in your face

Poe wins....... Colonial Mentality gone, Citizenship Confusion it is

So, sino na lang? Pano na lang?

Paki-explain. Pls.

As always, nakakapagod at nakakadrain manood ng balita.

The Story of Success

I completed the Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell audiobook for the second time around. This time, I think I was able to really get it and into my being. This author was recommended to me by my former career mentor, the first book she said I should read was Blink, which talks about our preconceived notions of the people, things and other stuff around us and how it affects our thinking and actions towards our work and relationships. I am yet to start with The Tipping Point, though I already have the .epub copy on my tablet.  

Going back to Outliers, Gladwell discussed Success in a different light. He emphasized the external factors that can affect one’s story of success. More than innate talent and intellect, he clearly said that one’s success is influenced by other important matters as follows:

1.      Privilege
Having that opportunity to be able to do what you are good at, it really would make one good at it.

So, what is this something that you have the privilege to do right now?

Me? Writing and travel for free in exchange for reviews.

2.      Constant Practice (10,000 hours)
      Talent maybe innate but how to be the best at something takes more than that. . Bill Gates, privileged and talented, started programming at the age of 13 years old and never stopped since then. The Beatles started playing in Germany for months and months in a certain bar before opportunity paved their way to stardom. They had to learn songs other than their compositions for requests of the customers.
      So, what is this/these something that you are or have been doing that you are willing to spend the 10,000 hours of your life?

3.      Cultural Heritage
      This is where environment get to affect our personalities and our styles of communication.

       What are those cultural practices and beliefs that either stop us or push us to be better?

4.      Practical Intelligence
Not all people with very high IQ end up being successful. Being able to articulate your needs and desires is very important.

How good are you at expressing yourself and what you need from others?

5.      Focus
To solve a math problem, to learn something new, it takes a lot of focus.

This is something I really, really need to work on. This is the things that I lack of.

How absorbed are you with what you’re doing and can do stay focus more than 22 minutes?

6.      Series of Events
Sometimes, things just happen.

Can you remember anything like this happen to you?

7.      Mentors
There are people who would see potential in you, push you to your limits and help you even if it cost them more than they can offer. Most of the time, it’s our parents.

I have been longing to be mentored.

8.      Chance
In some cases, to be successful, all we need is a chance at it. This is the most crucial part, because with that chance to be given, we still have to prove that we are worth it. However, there are those chances that are blown away, screwed up just because we have been too complacent and over-confident.

I am still working on that chance to be given to be. Apparently, it takes a lot of effort to prove oneself worth of a chance. I hope mine happens in this lifetime.

I wrote this trying to remember the pointers on top of my head so maybe I am still missing a piece or two point of views. It was good exercise I may say. It was an awesome book as well. As it made me realize so many things about myself, how I define success and ultimately to never lose that sense of gratitude because wherever better place we will go, it is not just a fruit of our labor on its own, but God had or will be putting in people, events and circumstances to make things happen.

God make things beautiful in His own time- Nikki Gil.

Shattered and Scattered

                   It’s a Monday as always, I wanted to write about things. Let me try to do so.

                  Shattered thoughts about just so many things. I don’t see any of them related to one another but in some ways, they all get to connect to me.

Homeland Series

                  The ending of Season 1 was kind of sh*t. It just ended like that.  Still, I'm hooked on to it. It was Saul. I want to have a mentor like Saul is to Carrie. It was an indirect mentoring on their part but nonetheless, the way Saul teaches Carrie and the way he cares how she grows in her career, it is just something I wish I could have. Somebody who would consider my ideas, give me pointers, let me grow, see me get disappointed, yet still know the right things to say at the end of the day, in the middle of all fucked up moments and just let me be me.

                The only weakness he has is his life of service. He willingly gave up the love of his life in exchange to his job as a CIA detective.

How To Get Away with Murder

                  I’m on Season 2. I like Wes Gibbons on this story. He struggled his way into Law School and all. He tries to do things the right way but still ending screwing things up and trying to live with that buried deep in his conscience.

On Making A Move

                  My colleagues and I had a few drinks after our last shift last week, we talked about so many stuff but most of it revolved on boys! Why? Why not, right? We're all girls yet we just have really different personality and different views on why and how to express interests on a guy. Is it okay for a girl to make a move? Up to what extent? Why wait? Why not wait? It was good conversation and a great way to get to know each other.

Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell
                  Out of the blue, I just wanted to listen to this audiobook again, as if I missed something the first time I completed it. Surely I did. Gladwell, made me realize a different definition of success. That more than talent, there’s the window of opportunity aka the circumstance, that it takes at least 10,000 hours of practice on something to be called an expert, it's practical intelligence over analytical intteligence, and for sure, there are still a lot to consider in trying to objectify and define success. I am not yet done with the audiobook. I wanted to linger of the thought of the 10k hours. I wanted to think of things that I am working on to that 10k hours.

7 Questions to Ask on What to do with My Life
                  Found it on Google while typing in “what to do with my life” once school is over, I wanted to take time and answers those questions.

Speaking of School……

                  Two more weeks and this semester is gonna be almost over! But my paperworks are not yet over and I’m pretty sure, that is something I should be trying to complete right now instead of this posting.

                  Oh well, it’s a Monday and if I don’t wanna waste my hard-earned money for tuition for this semester, I gotta start working on this much needed requirements.    
                  Bring it on Universe!